Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Putting in my Application Now

Me: I'm going to the gym tonight. I saw a picture of Audrina online today, and I died a little on the inside. Her body is amazing, other than her boobs. Perfectly flat, amazing stomach and nice legs.

Boyfriend: Yeah, she has a pretty nice body. But so do you, so stop crying.

Me: I know, I know. BUT my belly isn't also flat when I'm sitting down.

Boyfriend: Well, you better make your way down to 8% body fat then. Maybe do an Ironman.

Me: I'm pretty sure Audrina's never done an Ironman.

Boyfriend: I'm pretty sure I never said Audrina has done an Ironman, nor did I imply it. I did, however, imply that she likely has the body fat percentage of someone that has done an Ironman.

Me: So then how do I achieve the body fat percentage of someone who's done an Ironman without doing an Ironman?

Boyfriend: Strict diet and an expensive Hollywood personal trainer making you work out 5 days a week? Maybe gastric bypass. Living in harsh arctic conditions for a few years would probably do it. Or you could just do "Survivor" for a season.

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